CONFORM, CONFORM CONFORM!!!!!!

Lately everywhere I turn there is someone more or less yelling in my face that I must conform! Well I stand before all those who have come and all those who are still yet to come, and I very loudly yell back in your face...FUCK YOU!!!!

It has been a year now since my "awakening" and I know and see myself much more clearly each and every day. I am no longer that prisoner being bound by "the man" or any other who wish to bring me to my knees and conform to what they believe is the "right" way. Whether it be how I should act, think or feel. I am my own unique being and I realize now that for most of my life I have been held captive by those trying to conform me. No longer will I stand quietly by and allow them to try to hold control over me.

I look back into my past and see that even as a mere child I realized that there was something dreadfully wrong with what these demons were trying to do to me. As a child though you look for guidance from those whom you want to believe have their act together, when in all reality they don't! They point the finger at you and say you are out of control. I say to them...yes, I am out of control! I refuse to ever be in someone else control again.

What right does another have to tell someone how they should act, think or feel? I find that if I am not bringing harm to anyone in my actions then what business is it of anyone to try to conform me into any other actions than my own? Where exactly does one come by this superior power in telling me how I should think? Do I not possess a mind of my own? Yes I do! As far as my feelings go, there is no one who knows what I feel.

I wake up some days asking why it is that I must do what I must to acquire a piece of paper in order for me to do what it is that I already know how and what to do. Does this mean that I am conforming? In my eyes, no I am not. I am just pacifying the idiots who like to think that they have control over me. That is why while I am working towards obtaining said piece of paper I continually do what it is that I have been placed here to do.

You may argue over the lack of payment for my services. I will gladly argue back that I unlike you do not need monetary rewards. I receive payment for my services in many different ways. Whether it be with another providing me with a service that I might be in need of or just simply a sincere hug.

Where are the days when one simply traded services. Greed is now all that lines the pockets of so many. This in return has lead to far too many wars with far too many lives destroyed. Until those who desire greed above all else cease, we will never find peace among us.

This in itself is the most painful thing to not only my heart but my soul. This is my greatest fear! Nothing would make my life more complete than to see peace. I am no fool however and I do realize that I will most likely never see it with these eyes I possess now. My only hope is that it will come in time for the next generation. If the control freaks of this world will just back off and allow the children of this world to be their individual selves we may just have that hope become a reality.

One of these days you will look up and you will find me standing atop of a building and I will be standing side by side with those children and I will be screaming with not only my voice but my very soul....CONFORM, I THINK NOT!!!!!!!